Everybody Cheats or Do They?

I can't tell you how many times I have heard this or read this over the years on many different boards or on Facebook.

I am not referring to refeed or cheats that are supposed to be in your diet or when a trainer says have a cheat meal.  I believe 100% in refeeds and/or cheats while in contest prep. I am talking about when people cheat when they are not supposed to whether it is one bite of peanut butter or eaten entire boxes of cereal or even just a cookie or two or skipped WOs or cardio. The issue I have is when they post in their journals they have cheated on their plan then tons of people come in and pat them on the back and say "Oh it's OK everybody cheats" even when a person has repeatedly cheated. This is pertaining to unauthorized cheating on a contest plan.

How is this helping? I don't get it

1) Not everyone cheats, I do not cheat during prep and I know others who do not cheat.
2) I assume my competitors do not cheat which makes sure I don't cheat
3) By allowing yourself to think "everybody cheats" you are already giving yourself permission to do it by assuming it will happen because you believe EVERYBODY CHEATS

Do I think people should post anything mean in those journals? of course not but the words should be maybe to ask the person how bad they want this, remind them it is a competition and others aren't cheating instead of enabling the person in their cheating

When i go into prep I remember I CHOSE to do it
I chose to follow a diet
I chose to do the WOs
I chose to do the cardio
I chose to do whatever sacrifice it take to be my very best

And when you get through a prep without ever cheating or missing a workout or missing a cardio regardless how you place you can say you did your very best and you gave it 100% there was nothing more you could have done that alone makes you a winner

Often I am misunderstood when talking about this subject. I am not asking:
is it ok to cheat? Do cheat meals have their place?
Why do people cheat?
The purpose of cheat meals and refeeds?
Do we support people in their thread when they do cheat?

I am asking specifically why people chose the words EVERYBODY CHEATS when they respond in the thread. Is it because they believe everybody does cheat? Is it because they just don't know what else to say and feel saying that is being supportive? Is it because they themselves can't stick to thier diet? Yes people do fall off but no not everybody cheats.

My feeling is that saying "everybody cheats" is detrimental Why would the person think they can be strong enough to stick to their plan if everybody else cheats? how can one stick to a plan if they go in thinking everybody cheats? 

Go into your diet knowing you can stick to it 100%. Know that you will be standing next to others onstage who did not cheat.  Have faith that you are strong enough and can dot it!

What Does It Mean To Win

Below is something I wrote about winning about 5 weeks out from my show in 2009. As it turns out I not only won my class at that show 2009 Jr Nationals but I also won the overall and it was the first time ever I looked at myself and really saw a bodybuilder.

Since that show I have competed in 3 others I placed 4th at 2 and 1st at the 3rd but whether I was 4th or st I knew each time I stepped on stage I won - i was better than my previous show, i gave 100% every day.

Outside of the physical there are other ways to "win". Over the years in the sport I have met so many people that have become good friends. We support each other through prep and celebrate each others victories. I have won a circle of friends who work hard, who I am inspired by and who are there supporting me. They will be there no matter how I place.

Pushing through the struggles of prep and frustrations that can come in the off season and celebrating your accomplishments and victories you grow as a person and "win" by becoming a better person.

So when the show is over and you ponder am I a winner put the trophy and placing aside and really look deep at the whole picture and what you did to get there and who helped you along the way - then you will know you are a winner!

(written May 2009 during prep for 2009 Jr Nationals)

What Does It Mean To Win

"We all want to win, to place first but is that really what is means to win? To have a

subjective judge tell you whether you prep was a success or failure?

If coming in first is the only way you will view your prep as a success then more

times than not you will be disappointed. You can't determine what the judges will

like that day and you can't determine who will be standing on stage next you. I had a

friend on stage with 54 other girls in her class at Jr Nationals one year if coming in first is

the only thing that doesn’t suck then 54 of them failed.

I see people post in others journals when they aren’t first “You will do better next

time” why dismiss the success they made by saying winning is the only thing that

matters?

If you come in with a better look then your previous show.

If you made improvements you wanted. More muscle. Tighter conditioning. Better

symmetry.

If you gave it your all every day.

If you NEVER cheated on your diet. NEVER missed a cardio.

NEVER missed a workout.

If you gave it all you had each and every workout.

Then you have won and the trophy, if you get one, is icing.

With this mindset you can be a success regardless of the subjectiveness of this sport

and enjoy it so much more.

I see so many people stressing in their journals and not enjoying the process and the

journey. I see people not enjoying life and avoiding friends and family just because

food is around. What does it mean to win a trophy if your life has been miserable for

12, 16 or more weeks?

Believe me I am competitive. I thrive of beating the person next to me in the gym. I

WANT to win but I can’t control judges or what type of physique is next to me on

stage. I have came in first and won an overall and was miserable the entire prep

worried if I would be good enough. Was it worth it? No.

My prep for Nationals 2007 was the hardest one ever I made no changes in weight,

pictures or measurements for the first 6 weeks. But I stuck with it, I never cheated, I

pushed to complete workouts when I was tired. I placed 10th of 12; yet I am more

proud of that accomplishment of pushing thru and not giving up.

Now my current prep; the most I have ever had to drop about 30lbs. I have never

dropped more than 12 in a prep. I have really just let go and enjoyed it. I have

complete faith in Jeremy and I know I will be my best ever. Will it be good enough

for first maybe, maybe not but I have won because I did make the improvements I

wanted, I put on the muscle I need to balance my physique. 

Taking this mindset the cardio does not bother me. I have had zero problems with diet including going outwith friends and family and enjoying time with them while they eat my favorite foods. I haven’t missed a second of cardio or a workout. Do I have hard days – sure

as hell do! I have had cardio sessions where I was lightheaded and dizzy, I have had

workouts that I felt extremely weak but I pushed through. I know that the reps that

are the hardest where you feel you can’t move it are the ones that count. We have

discovered things about how my body works and I totally look at the scale as a mere

indicator of what is happening but I don’t base my mood on what it is doing.

I can look back on this prep with no regrets.

I am thoroughly enjoying this prep and am a winner regardless of my placing!"

2011 Looking Back, 2012 Looking Forward

Happy New Years to all my friends!! Today many people will be posting resolutions but I do not believe in New Year's resolutions. I believe in making changes and choices when the time arises not waiting for a specific day. When I quit smoking years ago I did not wait to make it a resolution. I woke up and said no more and quit that day. When I decided it was finally time to do something about my weight I did it. Everyday we have choices we can make to better ourselves and our lives. Do not wait for New Year's or next month or Monday or tomorrow. Always work on being the best you can be each and every day.

2011 had some struggles but was mostly very positive. 

I would say the greatest struggle was that my contest prep started off very badly with no progress for several weeks. My original plan was to compete at USAs but at 7 weeks out I had not really made any progress. I had a choice to make my trainer suggested I try lower calories and increased cardio for 10 days then decided if we should change to another show.  I gave it a lot of thought since I really wanted to do USAs but when I thought about it I realized I did not want to push my body that way. I thought if we were doing this at 7 weeks out what would i be doing at 5 or 2 weeks out and how would my body react after the show. I talked it over with Chase and Jeremy, my trainer, and decided to not do USAs but to focus on North Americans which was 14 weeks away.  Jeremy Minihan ( Size & Shape Fitness ) and I made changes and it turned into my best prep ever. I was in much better condition further out than ever before. We learned that I did not need tons of cardio. I ended up doing lees than half the amount of cardio each day yet was my leanest ever.  In all my previous preps I had gotten up to 2 or more hours of cardio but for this prep I did 60-75 min and it never increased those 14 weeks.   We actually cut it back started 2 weeks out and that was never done before.  I believe what we learned by completely changing the approach was the best thing that could have happened.  At North Americans I placed 1st in Middle Weight in both open and over 35 my best placing at a pro qualifier.  My body also responded the best ever after the show.

Many wonderful new people came into my life in 2011: My new coach and friend Dusty Hanshaw, and so many others from House of Fitness fit/physique club that have become our friends. I teamed up with a wonderful supplement company, my sponsor, iForce Nutrition and I hope 2012 brings them great success with their new products. I feel very blessed to be surrounded by such positive and supportive people.

2011 ended with being able to enjoy my entire family over the holidays.  I had not seen my mother, who lives in Maine since 2008. Everyone was together for the first time in years.

I plan on bringing lessons learned and the successes of 2011 into the new year and continuing to grow and improve as a person, friend, wife, mother, daughter, sister and body builder. My physique goals are to continue to maintain a leaner physique this off season and to add some muscle where it is needed.  I plan on bringing the very best Suzanne to the stage at the USAs in July with the help of my wonderful supportive team especially my best friend, soul-mate and love of my life - Chase.

May 2012 bring you health, love and success in all that you do!